were there not you - i'd be not too

damn i'm bored

2008-01-03T15:15:00.000+08:00

damn i'm bored!

i'm going to start teaching sengkang sec next week.
its so confirmed im scared..haha

but for now im bored like crazy..
nothing to do ...

amal's bday dinner

2007-12-21T23:34:00.001+08:00

well we went for picnic-style dinner at vivo today to celebrate Amal's birthday..even though it was belated..heehee

cheryl sherry shameera shengping and i agreed to meet at 330pm
but in the end only shengping came on time!
the rest was so late.
sorry sorry!
shameera was 2nd
and sherry was the last-not surprising!
lols.

well today was the 1st time i was like 1 and a half hours late!!

cheryl and i met up first to buy her shiny bag-which i totally like! lols!
and cheryl i still think the gold one was so pretty but black totally makes more sense=)

so anyway we didnt expect to be so late!
we felt like we got the RATNA disease..late late late..hahaha

when we actually reached, we had to rush rush
cheryl found it exciting-to rush and avoid clashing with amal..
lols.
we went to Gap to get Amal's tee
and had a problem with the tee colour..lols
cheryl was soo right in choosing purple!
i thought it was kinda gay..but it was nice
and it turns out Amal was wearing purple too!! lols
so yes cheryl you are so smart!=)

we decided to give Amal a doughnut cake!
with a candle!
it was so cool actually..
we had to buy a lighter at Cheers and the guy seemed to think cheryl is a smoker!
hahaha

and and WENKAI actually came
lols.
we was..as usual..acting like he was looking for us when in fact he saw us..
so we decided to ignore him when he came
but it did not exactly work.
so forget it.

anyway i thought the dinner was unique..

picnic at vivo's rooftop!

haha
im not exactly sure we surprised amal
but heck..its the thought that counts rite??
=)

_______________________________

i most probably got a job!
teaching at sengkang secondary

the thing is..im still laughing at this
AND my friends esp cheryl shameera sherry shengping
is laughing too!

cos im supposed to teach home economics!
omg.
there goes my hopes in teaching maths or science..
lols.

actually kak bear said home economics and art!
ART is soooo a NO NO!
i cant draw or do anything ARTy for nuts..
lols.

people cant believe im taking this.
and frankly i cant either.

but im taking this as a challenge
i think.

lols.

orchard again

2007-12-17T23:18:00.001+08:00

today i went orchard. again.
what else is there to do in singapore??

so anyway i went there to shop for my dad's birthday present.
we really have no idea what to get him this year...
tshirt?-got it 2yrs back
shirt?-last yr
belt?-last yr
wallet?-last yr
so this year?---we got him music cds.
oh god. its damn difficult finding oldies..we dont know the singers..we dont know the songs.
so we had to listen to one cd. and we bought another which has a few familliar names.
now im praying that he likes the songs.

job

2007-12-16T21:50:00.000+08:00

ok so now i won't get to be a sales person..cos i turned it down..

but at least i turned it down for something i really think i would love!
i may get a chance to work with CHILDREN! YES YES YES!

julia gabriel

IF i can get it that is..

bbq yesterday

2007-12-16T19:32:00.000+08:00

yesterday's bbq was fun=)

even though the day started out to be rather unpromising due to the heavy rain and strong wind. fortunately, hujan reda bila tym kita nak start! =)

i especially liked the kebabs! yummy!! me hungry already(:

cik po, kak long and kak kuk all reminded me and my sis to bring our taboo game.

in the end we did not play the darned game cos of time constraint..haha

PLUS i didnt get thrown into the pool! YES YES YES!

ALL the previous bbq i was thrown into the pool..thanks to my lovely aunts and uncle..

this time around my precious cik po was thrown into the pool instead! hehehehe

we celebrated my lil cousin's birthday too.

she is one lil cute thing! hahaha

she was sooo in love with the swimming pool i tell ya!

anyway, heard from suhaimi today! lols

he is still alive..thats good =p

want a job

2007-12-14T09:56:00.000+08:00

i wannn a job..
i already got registered as a relief teacher till end of 2008.
but don't know if i should teach..haha
if i teach, i would prefer a secondary school..but still..as long as i get a job..
d.e.s.p.e.r.a.t.e. lols
but not bad enough to want to do telemarketing or give out flyers kind of thing..heehe
and i got a reply from a JC..innova JC..hahaha
nothing confirmed but im asked to send in my resume and academic credentials..
now..help..should i try for a JC?
im scared..what if i dont know the topic what im supposed to teach? lols.
but i guess it has to be the freshest in my mind rite.
ok im blabbering.
ciao o.O

morning-the day after

2007-12-13T11:32:00.000+08:00

i dreamt the weirdest dream.
it was 3years ago kind of situation but different cos im 3years older.
haha!
oh well im not going to tell..=p

anyway im still thinking..should i try being a sales assistant or go teach?
i have an opening for sales but have yet got a response from any school.
i dont want to do home tutoring where i go to the student's place..
i'd rather the student come to my place or i teach at a centre.
oh im so difficult!

and i still dont know what i want to do in uni..how sad is that......
i'd like to figure that out soon.

a new one

2007-12-13T00:35:00.001+08:00

why i decide to blog tonite..i have no idea.

for now, i'm waiting for boredom to strike me.

just got back from my indo holiday.
and i tell you..you can go crazy shopping there!
i almost did..spent so much but got so much..

but the best is still the zoo and the volcano.
i dont feel like listing everything here cos there is just too much to list..haha

the photos are up in my photobucket..so go see =)

anyway..
was just thinking tonight..
i want to meet so many people..but have yet to find the time.
how sad is that?

aneesa left for india
renuka lost her phone
ratna left for china
suhaimi soon gone for ns
ivan soon gone for ns

i expect boredom to strike soon
ha.

holiday

2007-06-11T23:12:00.000+08:00

the weekend trip proves to be a really gr8 idea! love it love it love it!

shared a room with my sis and cuzin..we talked till like 2plus the 1st nite..
guess wat we talked abt..hehee boys..duh rite..
talked abt crushes..and stuff..i told her mine and she told me hers!

we went shopping shopping=)
theres a gr8 spore sale here and we went KL to shop...what went thru my relative's and mom's minds..haha
but we stil found nice things :)

we played "taboo" with my cuzins, aunts and uncles..it was like the adults forgot they were adults and became kids!! sooooooo fun..i tink we all laughed and shouted till the whole level cursed us..poor other ppl in Concorde ;p
i mean if u have played it before you should know the excitement..can hardly blame us for the noise..

and oh there are a few hotties there..the ang mohs were very courteous to us..they said 'hello' and smiled..so unlike singaporeans..ish ish ish
but there was one old white man..he was like so eewww..he was like hitting on my cuzins and me..errgh..
can smile and do the eye thing..errgh..

other than tt, it was a really fun trip tt im glad i didnt miss =)

2007-05-27T12:26:00.000+08:00

ok im lying.
im not over it..im close to getting over it for good i think..
actually i dont care.
i refuse to let it rule my mind.

2007-05-27T12:19:00.000+08:00

the "holidays" have started.
is it any surprise that we have to study like crazy again thru this holiday?
i guess nt.

I wonder why they call it june holidays..shouldnt it be june study leave?

ok i dont know what im babbling abt.

just wanted to say..i am over with what im supposed to be over with.
(:

tmr is chem spa..can u imagine..spa..such a nice name. but in reality its like errgh.
anyway tmr is the last chem spa yay! no more chem spa for me =)

2007-05-19T23:19:00.000+08:00

college day is no doubt really 'fun'.
we sat there and watched the screen...oh how 'interesting'
the GOH was really..i duno..i felt that her speech was given at the wrong occasion.
like it was not a speech but a lecture. wDH.
so out of place..

quit tuition tdy.
i don't understand me.
when i was still having maths tuition i wanted to stop, wanted to quit.
then when i finally did, i feel like im gg to miss tuition.
ahh..don't know what i want.

it's really sad that miss ding is not teaching my biology class anymore!!
i want miss ding...sobs..sobs
its like all of us want miss ding..
she is so sweet and kind :)
during tutorials i'm not sleepy.

now...
i am not looking forward for bio tutorial next week.
asked miss ding when is she taking us back.
she said probably term 4.
err i tink it wont happen..sobs

going to miss miss ding..
like cheryl said, we are attached to miss ding already..

why why...why now...change tutors again..
last time i wanted some tutors to change and it happened. but not now..not now..

i've said this before
again and again.
what's going on in my head
i know its wrong
and i told myself i want distance
and i'm already getting over it.
but.
deep down inside..deep deep down
when i actually think abt it..
i still hold this hope.
that somehow, someway it'll be different
it won't be wrong then.
its like temptation
when i see, hear, think it, i'll dare dream it again.
i get lost in such emotions.
which is again wrong.
everything seems wrong.

again

2007-05-19T23:06:00.000+08:00

here i am. i think i'm starting to blog again. but shall be quiet about it. you read, you know. if i have time, i blog.

A fresh new start

2007-02-21T18:59:00.000+08:00

I don't know why.
Suddenly I feel like blogging.

Why is it some people just don't seem to realise what they have?
Like why can't they see that there are people who care.
Instead they still insist that nobody cares about them.
Hello! There are people who eat with them, sit with them, bother about them, talk to them, notice them, befriend them.....
AND STILL THEY CLAIM THAT THEY ARE ALONE IN THIS WORLD!!

ARE WE NOT GOOD ENOUGH TO BE YOUR FRIENDS THEN??
What do they want??
The President to talk to them and only then they suddenly don't feel lonely anymore???

Do they realise that by this action, they are making others angry and irritated??
Well if they don't, then let me tell them..
HEY.. YOU ARE MAKING PEOPLE ANGRY!!!

These people also always seem to want people to care about them.
But do they make the effort to care about those around them?
Frankly, no. If they call those minimal things they do as care..and seem to think its enough..well TOO BAD its not.

TREAT OTHERS THE WAY YOU WANT TO BE TREATED.

simple message.
If you still don't get it then I wish you all the best in your life ahead cos you are just going to be left behind.
In a world where people just don't have the time to be angels.
School and work life is different.
Even if you already have some experience.
Let me tell you that experience you have is really so minute and so different from the REAL work life you are going to be in next time.
Not only work life but also the LIFE you have to face after school ends.

Thats it.
Change is not about saying that you will try to change..
BUT it is about YOU REALLY CHANGING.

5hours wait

2006-10-18T20:30:00.000+08:00

interesting fact: hahas yest nite while doing pw online with my grp, as usual, we strayed away from the actual topic..sherry realised that we can call ppl with cute names..it was so fun we decided to give a cute name for everyone in 0635! =D
some of the names:
jacq - jacjac
sherry - sweetsweet / shersher (cant decide..lols)
sandhya- sandsand
wenkai - kaikai
me - lyly
chanel - rourou (is dat how u spel it..?)
suhaimi- susu (hahaha)

-------------------
we had chemistry lesson in the morning today. from 745 to 915.
1 1/2 hrs of chemistry lecture..

actually it was not too bad cuz at least our time is well spent.
after chemistry, OMG...we rotted and rotted and rotted...!!

we had to wait for 5 hours for this SGC talk at 2pm!!!
how frustrating rite..

immediately after chemistry i did pw with my grp..it was hilarious..
cuz kaikai wanted to go gym..he was like a little boy la pleadin us to let him go gym 1st before doing pw..lol
obviously we didnt agree and forced him to do pw 1st..he was acting so defeated..it was so funny! =D

after pw, we were like rotting cuz it was juz 11plus! still had like 3hours!!!!
somehow we managed to do it..

my comment about the talk: i think it was actually a waste of time..
why cant they push it to another day..? it was actually a short talk but then they had a begging session..
its like so omg.. the school is desperate..they wanted ppl to join the ccas which has syf the next yr..
its like they were begging..
and had a contract cca thing..
and if they won gold, they might get to go to for an overseas trip..

shopping today

2006-10-09T23:40:00.000+08:00

Today started out like crap!
Had to go to school at 1230 just to pass a proposal to a teacher..
my friend smsed me on SUN morning to inform me that i have to go to school on MON to pass a proposal to a teacher with her.
I was like so pissed cuz its like so last min..you tell me last min that i hav to go to school to pass a proposal??
Its like HELLO I have a life you know!
I already planned to go out with my other friends..and here you come and tell me that i have to meet to pass a piece of paper to a teacher.!
but ok..in the end i decided to go cuz i didnt want to argue and make the situation difficult..

but guess what???!
i bloody wasted my time there!! can you imagine..!
1230 reach school
1235 met her and went to see the teacher
1250+ leaving school

1235-1250+ stood there and smile while my friend answered the teacher's qns

WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i went to school just to stand there, smile and look nice for 15mins!!!!!!!
unbelievable!!
totally unbelievable!!!

I was so pissed, I felt like screaming in public..but of course i didn't..why should i make myself look stupid all because I am angry at someone.. not worth it AT ALL..!

anyway, went home and screamed and shouted..until my sister mangaged to make me smile. THANK GOD for my sister. otherwise i think my mood would have been spoilt the whole day.
----------------------------

at ard 230 i left home to meet cheryl, sherry and ivan to shop! yayness =D
shameera met us later at ard 6+pm
first time i break fast outside..felt weird haha but ok not bad lols
i was so thirsty today and drank 2 cups of sugarcane =D ahhh..
oh.. i wanted to buy my wallet but the shop closed already...sighs..
anyway i din buy anything much haha
reached home at around 10plus i think..
so now i feel pretty "unfulfilled"
wells nvm tmr im goin out wit my sister! yay!! her psle ends tmr!
so tmr i can buy by books, wallet(hopefully), shades and 3/4pants!
hopefully i have time ah..oh and how could i forget..COOKIES! hahahaha

=)

ps. ivan did this really SILLY but v. hilarious thing at marina bay..hahahaha
i mean, ivan, how silly can you get??
hmm maybe i shall share this in my next entry..
lols
now i feel like sleeping..

*stil thinking of the design for the little project..=D

promos=over

2006-10-05T22:09:00.000+08:00

yay.
promos are finally over!

and i dont feel like blogging right now..hahaha

-

mugging at mac again...

2006-09-07T18:53:00.000+08:00

Today i had to go to school for GP..sighs..
went to school with suhaimi and ivan..we took 853.
we sat right at the back of the bus..and there was this ADORABLE baby in front looking back at us!! so adorable laaa!! she was like looking at suhaimi and i asked suhaimi to wave at her and he was like busy laughing and he was saying that he wanted to show the baby his fist(like want to fight)!! jokingly of course..
somehow i tot the baby looked like she wanted to cry..! hahaha but she kept on looking at us for quite sometime..i think she might be thinking that these people are like nuts..
anyway sometime later, suhaimi suddenly said "turn around! turn around!" in a tone that i dunno how to describe..it just sounded like he was scared..or excited..i not sure..haha
i was like thinking what in the world is wrong with him..when i looked back i was like so terrified laa...there was a stupid baby cockroach!! EWWW!!
we immediately moved to the other end of the seat! its like so ewww!! shows how dirty the bus is!! errgh...
ok must feedback...clean the bus man!

after gp, sherry, cheryl n i decided to study but we didnt know where to study..if we studied in school, there is no lunch..so we decided to go to suhaimi's mac! hahaha his mac ah..i meant the mac he is working in..
he was like so excited! hahaha
coolness~!
but before we go, suhaimi, ivan, wenkai and yansee wanted to play badminton.. so we only left school at like 1plus (i tink!)

ok guess what my lunch was...
i ate the same thing everytime i go mac...im like getting so sick of it already laa...!
ate nuggets again! sighs..
anyway, at mac we saw suhaimi worked! hahahaha
we were like laughing and laughing non-stop..gosh he looks so funny in that uniform...!! and he was like sweeping and mopping the floor..
somehow i tot he looks awkward sweeping...
he somemore say no ah..got style...errs...like..o...k...
haha
cheryl was like saying that she wanted to see him wipe the door! hahaha that is going to be funnier..for some reasons that i dont know..lol

we went home at around 5plus..when we were waving goodbye to suhaimi, cheryl said that the 2 men sitting near us was saying bye to us..like errmz...

anyway, i did around 7 questions for maths..cheryl and sherry thought that just now was quite a waste of time cuz they did not feel like they did anything..lol
cuz we were talking a lot..haha ok that is like so wrong..

hehe.

oooh and the best thing was, i had a straight bus home from there!! yay!!
969! and the ride was only around 10 mins!! yayness!!

mugging at kfc

2006-09-06T19:47:00.000+08:00

ok today is really gr8 haha
managed to revise a few more topics for bio!
i realised that i have been revising bio and bio only... :(
and maybe a bit of maths..
tmr i am going to stay back to do maths! sigh

anyway its so shocking..there was so many people studying..
shameera n i decided to go to amk lib at 1030 cuz we had hoped to get a proper place to study..cuz the lib opens at 10..
i was late hehe (again!)
but shameera was there at 1040 like dat..and there were no more tables available!
what is happening to singaporean students??? so frustrating..ppl are tinking like us!
we had to sit on the "sofa"..sheesh
when cheryl n sherry came we then went for lunch and decided to mug at kfc instead..
and yeah it was so much better..got table ah..
yepz so thats it..we studied till like ard 5..not bad right?
hahaha

ok im going to watch idols!
tatas =)

mugging

2006-09-05T21:35:00.000+08:00

ok i seriously have a problem with tuition..haha

somehow someway im like always late for tuition..was supposed to meet shameera n ratna at bishan mrt stn at 1030 cuz tuition starts at 11..and im like late!
this happens most of the time when goin for tuition..i seem to be late a lot..
its like so wrong....most of the time i wait for ppl n not the other way ard..
haha
oh wells~
anyway tuition started like 30min later cuz mr rafiq was late..haha
during tuition i was like so damn hungry la..kept on asking shameera wat time is it? haha wanted to go eat.....u cant blame me k..i din even finish my breakfast cuz i was so worried that i wld be freakin late..

after tuition aneesa, shameera, cheryl, sherry n me went to muggg...
we wanted to study at bishan lib..but the lib damn crowded laa...
so sickenin..
we had to go to the ulu mac at bishan interchange to study.. and shockingly de ulu mac is not so ulu animore..haha
quite crowded oso la but luckily we got a seat..

studied frm 330plus to 7plus..not bad ah..i covered bio..
bio is fun!
haha
but somehow i cant seem to score..
:( sad laa..

yeah so dats it for today..tmr goin muggin again wit shameera n cheryl at lib..dunno whether goin to bishan or amk..
we are goin to go earli!! yay! hahahaha
=)

oh my god..what is happening to me..

comments

2006-09-03T13:03:00.000+08:00

i just read suhaimi's blog. and i would like to say..WOW..hahaha
never thought i was that mentionable..hmmz...
suhaimi, if you are reading this, i just wanted to say that im so touched..haha.
well this entry is for you.

suhaimi..
frankly, i have never met someone like him before..in my whole 17 years of living..never have i ever met such a person.
haha.
he is so unique and hilarious.
when i just got to know him, he was like so self-conscious..
always saying things like "i know la i'm from yishun sec..."
its like he is constantly looking down on himself..
he is so worried about what people say about him and he cant seem to think of anything else..haha.

Now, i can see the change in him.
he loves to laugh and oh my god..he is so super lame!
but the most important thing is, he has become more confident of himself.
he does not constantly think of what people think of him.
im not saying he does not think about it at all..
but he is doing it less..much less..
so GOOD! =D

anyway, suhaimi is actually a stubborn person..sometimes like a goat! wahahaha
its like when he believes that he has to do something in a certain way, he wont want to do it in another manner at all!! even though people keep on telling him to change..
i dont know how to say this..but yeah..

haha.

all in all, he is actually a very sweet guy..cares a lot about others (in his own way).. he is not so good at showing his care and concern for his friends.. but really in his own way, he is actually a caring person.

so in the end, i can say that im lucky to have met a person such as him. even though sometimes he gets on my nerves..haha. deep down i know he is a kind and sweet friend.

suhaimi. thank you.

=D

tagged by suhaimi

2006-09-03T12:23:00.000+08:00

tagged by suhaimi.

FOUR JOBS YOU'VE HAD IN YOUR LIFE:
1. Student
2. Student
3. Student
4. Student (oh how boring can i get..)

FOUR MOVIES YOU COULD WATCH OVER AND OVER:
1. Harry Potter movies
2. Pirates of the Caribbean
3. Titanic
4. Pearl Harbor

FOUR CITIES YOU'VE LIVED IN:
??? how big can spore be..?

FOUR TV SHOWS YOU LOVE TO WATCH:
i rarely watch series..no tym..
1. Spore Idol?
2.
3.
4. Martin Mystery (haha.)

FOUR PLACES YOU'VE BEEN ON VACATION:
1. Bali
2. Cameron Highlands
3. Pangkor (is that how its spelt?)
4. KL

FOUR WEBSITES YOU VISIT DAILY:
1. yahoo.com (homepg)
2. hotmail.com (email)
3. friends' blogs
4.

FOUR OF YOUR ALL-TIME FAVORITE RESTAURANTS:
1. home
2. errs..LJ
3. mac
4. no pref.

FOUR OF YOUR FAVORITE FOODS:
1. almost anything my mom cooks
2. chocolates!
3. pizza
4. spaghetti

FOUR SCHOOLS YOU'VE ATTENDED:
1. Nanyang Junior College
2. Tanjong Katong Girls' School
3. Woodlands Ring Primary School
4. Qiaonan Primary School

FOUR PLACES I'D RATHER BE RIGHT NOW:
1. my bed
2. e sofa in my living room
3. study table
4. nowhere..just disappear..

FOUR THINGS YOU FIND YOURSELF SAYING
1. what nonsense!
2. coolness
3. yeah rite
4. ok

FOUR PEOPLE TO DO THIS:
do i have to do this..?
i shall not.. haha.

tagged by sherry

2006-09-03T11:00:00.000+08:00

tagged by sherry! oh dearie...haha.

Seven RANDOM facts about me:
~ i love the colour pink (ok who doesn't know this fact..)
~ i like to stay up at night to hang on the phone
~ i share all my problems with my sister 1st
~ my bathing time is on average 20mins
~ i laugh a lot
~ i enjoy being in ny more than tk
~ i like to disturb my sister (wahahaha!)

Seven things that scare me:
~ insects
~ and all the other small creatures similar to insects
~ heights
~ ghosts..
~ walking alone at night
~ pictures filled with dots
~ rejection

Seven favourite songs:
~ Like a rose by a1
~ The Extra Mile by Laura Pausini
~ Unfaithful by Rihanna
~ Buttons by PCD
~ Oh Kasih by Bhumiband
~ Diari Seorang Lelaki by Pretty Ugly
~ Suluhkan Sinar by various artists

Seven things I like most:
~ My family
~ bestfriends
~ 0635 (wee~!)
~ TAufik!
~ my bed (ahhh...)
~ my hp!!
~ my computer!! haha.

Seven people to do this?
i dont really like this part..so yeah.. haha.

tuition resident

2006-09-02T17:38:00.000+08:00

today is so boring actually
din do anything much..
woke up at 8am to say byebye to my parents cuz they going to the shop
den i decided to sleep again cuz tuition is lyk at 11am..
haha.
so i woke up at 915..bathe...got ready..ate breakfast..
by the time i went out it was already 10.15...had to take the train at 10.05
thank god i was not that late..shameera smsed me at ard 1020++ saying that she was going to be late but in the end she was earlier than me!
haha.
anyway ratna couldnt come for tuition cuz she is sick..(GET WELL SOON RATNA!)
so only aneesa, shameera n i attended tuition..
when shameera n i entered the room, it was so stuffy and warm..so when we on the air-con we decided to adjust the temp to 16^c...
haha.
thanks to that we ended up freezing..so super cold!
and as usual the stupid resident fruit fly was busy flying around..
aneesa was saying she was going to be a murderer! hahaha
stupid fly..

anyway thats all i have to say for today..
its like already 4.41pm..
nid to get ready to go out for dinner! yayness~!

Realization

2006-09-01T23:42:00.000+08:00

ok i am lyk so totally embarrassed...!
why??
because suhaimi went and blog about things that should have stayed among sherry, him n i...
-totally embarrassed-

ok thats all abt embarrassment
hahaha

anyway that day i was sitting down in charles and keith waiting for my mom to try out shoes.. and i was thinking.. and i realised something..
people shop for new stuff and most of the time they will wear these new stuff to go shopping again..so they buy clothes and shoes to wear so that they have new things to wear when they shop again...hahaha ok mabbe you mite not understand but yeah...

another realization..
the most meaningful song in my life currently is
THE EXTRA MILE by Laura Pausini
whenever i listen to this song i will get this funny feeling inside...its like all the memories about O2 and the leadership camp comes rushing back! not that the memories are bad..just so *sigh* (cant explain)
all i know is this song is currently the most meaningful song to me

one more thing..
i still have not made up my mind about the Situation...
oh god pls help me thru this...

im so stressed...very stressed...

-hopes for the end-

fun man!

2006-08-22T19:40:00.000+08:00

*yawn*

I am lyk so tired today...very very very tired...slept at like 3.30am last night..
In school I was like half-dead in the morning..had to read econs during the break but it my brain was lyk already so saturated!
Had a chance to sleep during CT period..that shengping ah he! wah so irritating..i was like sleeping so peacefully and he had to come and disturb me...sigh...im so going to go crazy at the end of this year!
anyway, i felt better when i woke up...haha

the best part about today is the journey home!
oh it was like so hilarious laa...
went home with suhaimi and ivan
we had to go j8 to get something 1st..i asked suhaimi to come along and at first he was reluctant..but in the end, he decided to come along!

MY GOD can you actually believe it??? This is the 1st time i actually went to shop (even if it is for a shortshort while..to get someting..) with suhaimi!!

SEE today is wonderful! haha

anyway after we bought the things, we went to the mrt station to go home..
we missed our train so we had to wait for like 6 minutes..i decided to sit down ah..

and guess what??

suhaimi also decided to sit..BUT ivan decided to stand..hahaha dunno why!

hmmm let me side track a bit...i really wonder why ivan rarely sits down when we go home with people...ivan can you tell me why?? lol!! when i go home with him alone he sits...but when there are others, he prefers to stand...for some unknown reasons...hahaha he is funny rite?..right! wahahaha

anyway, as i was saying...yah so since ivan wanted to stand, suhaimi was like saying that he felt guilty for sitting down if ivan stands..
so in the end they were engaged in a hilarious arguement about sitting down!! it was like soo funny looking at them argue! can you imagine? of all things to argue about....wahahahaha!

in the end they both decided to stand while I sit down comfortably! lol =p

when our train arrived, we were like trying to squeeze into the train... we ended up standing at a place where there was no pole or anything to hold onto if we were to lose our balance..
and guess what...when i was like losing my balance that suhaimi went to grab the plastic bag i was holding onto...thanks ah suhaimi! instead of ensuring i din fall he prefers to save the plastic bag...thanks...

the whole journey was like so full of nonsense...but it was fun..felt like a long time since i went home with ivan and suhaimi and joke around like that..!
not bad...not bad... hahaha

and ok heres the thing...suhaimi and i were disturbing ivan....
we were saying that we were going to blog about ivan..telling stories about his silly and funny moments!
i still feel like doing that...hahaha
but i shall not...
maybe another day..
he was like threatening me...saying that if i do blog about his silly moments, he is going to do someting to my blog!
hahahaha
welll.... ivan.... i just talked about you in this blog entry...we shall see... =p

wowness coincidence

2006-08-21T20:07:00.000+08:00

Definition of
Coincidence: the occurrence of events that happen at the same time by accident but seem to have some connection

haha.

seriously i think there is something about ivan! hahaha

Today, is the 3rd time we met coincidentally in a public transport. Really shocking but wow! hahaha

I stayed back to study today with Sherry. We sat together with Wenkai and Ivan in the library. Wenkai has training and Ivan has a meeting. So like obviously i wont be going home with him today right?? Well you are wrong! lol

At 5plus I decided to go home...so tired laa...while studying i fell asleep like twice..!

anyway, i was waiting for 156 for quite a long time...thoughts in my head were "hungry!" and "tired!". seriously...my "lunch" was like at 10plus(after chem prac)...

then 156 came! at last...

when i boarded the bus, guess who i saw waving excitedly(lol!!) at me??? guess guess! lol

ok i noe you noe redi but well i want to tell still
wahahahaha

IVAN! yes ivan! again! this is like the 3rd time such a thing happen...this is not counting the time we coincidentally meet in the mornings to go to school...lol

isnt it like so cool! =D

1st time: went home with Suhaimi n Ivan..then ivan decided to go to J8 1st cuz he wanted to buy something..so Suhaimi n i decided to go 1st cuz it was quite late...we were saying that if fate says that we meet l8r, then we will...hahaha and surprisingly we did! hilarious cuz the way we meet was so comical! hahahaha

2nd time: was on the way home in the train with suhaimi...then at yishun suhaimi got off the train and IVAN came in! lol can you imgaine..of all times...of all parts of the train...hahahaha

3rd time: TODAY! wahahaha

how cool is that?? THREE times...3...well we shall see if there are more to come...hahahaha

got to go study econs for the test tmr!

haha.

learn how to light a match

2006-08-20T21:09:00.000+08:00

Yayness~!
Today, I learn how to light a match!
hahahaha
actually its not as bad as i thought..this is the result of being such a sweet little girl...i never played with matches okay...lol
i learnt how to use a lighter on June 6th 2006...hahaha that was because i had to light my sister's birthday candles...
and now i have to learn how to light matches because chemistry SPA requires us to know how to light matches...
just a few minutes ago i tried for the 1st time...
the last chemistry practical, we had to use a match and i tried to light mine...but somehow it could not light up..instead it broke into 2...sigh..
in the end shengping helped me..lol
well now i know how to do it myself..! yay!
hahaha

ok thats all i have to say for today...have to do maths differentiation tutorial again now...sigghh...

sad life

2006-08-20T00:53:00.000+08:00

such a sad life i lead...
the whole of last week i went home late...damn tired!
tests....tests....practicals(spa)...tutorials....cca...
aaahhh....why...

monday- went home late cuz of extra lessons
tuesday-afternoon pe..! lateee...
wednesday-tuition
thursday-extra lessons
friday-waited 5hrs for a lame meeting! damn it la...thank god i have such sweet friends...sherry stayed back to study with me...but before that went out to j8 for lunch with sherry, cheryl, ratna, ivan, shengping n mervis..thank god...or else i relie would have been more pissed...

dont even want to think about friday afternoon...

yeah so anyway...so many things to do...i have not done enough..but im like already so tired...die...

--

IDOLS

2006-07-22T23:50:00.000+08:00

Oh. my. god.
Today started out damn boring laa...

had to attend the class exco course thingy..
we had to be there like at 9! woke up at 7 and left home at 8..damn tired laah...
yest i slept at like 1-2 liddat...sooo tiring!!
do what you mite ask..hahaha chaT!!chAt!! hey you can't blame me okay...

so anyway had to wake up so early to go for a course that requires me to sit for 2hrs!! T-W-O hours!
sooo sleepy yet i cant sleep cuz it was quite a small grp......
in the end there i was paying attention (the best i cld)
hahaaha
and guess wat??
the slides printed out for us had this particular symptom for a certain psychological problem...
--->oh btw im the well-being rep for my class so have to take care of the welfare of the class rite? yeah so this course is supposed to teach us how to do that properly...ha.ha.<---
ok back to the problem thingy...
it was hilarious la..cuz it reminded me of someone immediately!!
hahahahahahaha
wont put it online here thou..im such an angel!

after the course thingy, we (ivan, ratna n ME) went for lunch at J8!!
haha
we could not decide on where to eat exactly
so we stand at the side of this specs shop to decide...
no one wanted to make the decision...
we stand there damn long lah
relie u noe....y do i always hav to make the dcision one...
in the end i say food court
when we went there, the whole place was like crowded so we changed our minds
haha
in the end we ate at long john...again...

ok here is the worst thing that happened today!
damn mad laarrh
we sat on the table that was so messy..
the person was supposed to clean it up rite?
but you noe what she did??
she just stupidly ignored us! ignored our messy table!
and i tell you long john at j8 is small
so its like so damned obviously..you can see which table clean or dirty..
she walked passed us, behind us, beside us...but din bother cleaning our table
she cleaned the other unoccupied tables
and purposely din bother to clean ours!!!
soooo mad laa!!
we helped her put the things together so its easier for her to clean but she STILL din clean the table!
DAMN HER
ivan lost his patience and he carried some of the things to throw!
can you imagine that??
what kind of service is this????!
STOOPID I TELL YOU
after ivan threw some, then she decided to clear our table!
F**K her la!
what is her problem!
she showed this damned face somemore!
wah felt like knocking her upside down laa...
yah...that was pissy offie...

*breathe*

anyway...we realised that the idols were coming to j8!
hahaha
so ivan decided that we shld go see awhile
and so we did!!
ooohhh!!! so exciting!!!
hahahaha
the idols were late...(not surprising rite?)
lol
but when they reached, they were oh so cool
haha
ratna was lyk so crazy for joakim laa
cant blame her! he was so hot! so cute! so good!!
hahaha
only prob is he cant sing
but hopefully he can go far
cuz its like so nice to look at him!
hahaha

went home late after that...
at 5 got tuition
so in the end i reached home lyk ard 330
went crazy telling my sis abt the idol thing..bathe..went out at 420
hahaha
was supposed to mit shameera n qin lei at bishan (again) at 430
i tot i was lyk going to be so late for tuition la
i told shameera n qinlei to go 1st
but they waited for me!!
soooo swwweeettt!!!
thank you!!
in the end we werent late ah...thank god!

after tuition went to causeway pt wif lyana...den we decided to go popular
but i dunno y i felt like entering the cd-rama shop 1st..
haha
and thank god i decided to ah
cuz we found the HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL SOUNDTRACK!!!
soooo happy
haha
at last we found it!

yeah!!
so all in all today is such a coool day!! love today!
=D

GP tutors ~ hahaha

2006-07-20T22:42:00.000+08:00

Blogging.
Is there something wrong about blogging that only gp tutors can see?
haha.
but seriously, why is it that both my previous gp tutor and current gp tutor seem to feel that blogging is a bad thing..?
I don't understand.
They seem to have the same mindset.
Maybe because they teach general paper and they love to question everything and criticize almost everything.
Not that its a bad thing.
I want to make it clear that I am not saying that they are wrong.
Its just that I can't help but wonder why they feel that way.
During today's gp tutorial, my tutor was saying that blogs are like an invasion of one's privacy. She tried to blog ONCE and could not seem to do it. Her reason was that she could not imagine her students reading her blog and knowing everything that she did in her daily life. lol~
She also said that she has never read her students' blogs before and she doesn't intend to.
hahaha
wonder why ah.. ;p
how hilarious the way tutors think...
or is it because our tutors are young and we younger..so there is a generation gap?? lolz~
-just what I thought about today-

2006-07-18T22:21:00.000+08:00

Such an old song..I know..but I love it!
Like A Rose ~ A1

And as I look into your eyes
I see an angel in disguise
Sent from God above
For me to love
To hold and idolise

And as I hold your body near
I'll see this month through to a year
And then forever on
Til life is gone
I'll keep your loving near

And now I've finally found my way
To lead me down this lonely road
All I have to do
Is follow you
To lighten off my load

You treat me like a rose
You give me room to grow
You shone the light of love on me
And gave me air so I can breathe
You open doors that close
In a world where anything goes
You give me strength so I stand tall
Within this bed of earth
Just like a rose

And when I feel like hope is gone
You give me strength to carry on
Each time I look at you
There's something new
To keep our loving strong
I hear you whisper in my ear
All of the words I long to hear
Of how you'll always be
Here next to me
To wipe away my tears

And now I've finally found my way
To lead me down this lonely road
All I have to do
Is follow you
To lighten off my load

You treat me like a rose
You give me room to grow
You shone the light of love on me
And gave me air so I can breathe
You opened doors I closed
In a world where anything goes
You give me strength so I stand tall
Within this bed of earth
Just like a rose

And though the seasons change
Our love remains the same
You face the thunder
When the sunshine turns to rain
Just like a rose

You treat me like a rose
You give me room to grow
You shone the light of love on me
And gave me air so I can breathe
You opened doors I closed
In a world where anything goes
You give me strength so I stand tall
Within this bed of earth
Just like a rose

You give me strength so I stand tall
Within this bed of earth
Just like a rose

what do u do when...

2006-07-17T20:33:00.000+08:00

I thought I had forgotten.
I thought I had gotten over it.
I thought I had moved on.

I THOUGHT!

Never did I expect myself to look back and realise that I did not really forget..
Its like just something I forced myself to put behind but it's still there..i just pretended not to see it.

And now, when someone actually cared enough to ask about it..., I find that I never actually brought it out in the open before to try and figure it out...

Before,
I just thought about how much it hurts.. it was so suffocating..! like everyday was such a torture because I can't forget and constantly thought about it.. REGRET was the only thing in my mind.. its like suddenly i felt so empty..

It was a loss.. and this loss is most probably forever.. there is just no turning back!!

Why??? WHY! why did i go and do it anyway?

I asked myself that soooo many times but I never could come up with a good answer..

Nevertheless, I find that after sharing this past with a kind soul, I feel like I am really starting to let go. I mean lyk really really starting to let go..

So THANK YOU for actually asking..nobody actually cared enough to ask..
its like even the ones closest to me thought it was not so bad.. thought that i have really forgotten about it..but you asked..so is it true that those closest to you might sometimes overlook the most impt things in your life?

i don't know.

how do i noe..

2006-07-04T21:13:00.000+08:00

How do I know whether you're doing it because you really want to?
Or is it because you feel guilty that you did it for someone else..
so you decide to do it for me..
How do I know??
If it is because you feel guilty, then I think it's better if you don't do it at all!
That is my decision.
-full stop-

sufferings! 2

2006-06-30T00:21:00.000+08:00

Just 2 pics i'd like to show u...Read my entry below this...

Taken from:
http://www.boston.com/news/packages/underattack/news/profile_afghanistan.htm

Taken from:
www.iacenter.org/afghan/afghanistan.htm

sufferings!

2006-06-30T00:10:00.000+08:00

I watched this movie the other day.
"Qaisy & Laila"

Many might think that it is a love story but NO no its not! It sure sounds like one right? With the title and all...but here i am telling you that it is not!
This movie portrays the reality of life, what we normally don't think about, don't seem to bother. It is about war and its consequences..about religion and believing in God..about surviving in a land where everyday, innocent children, teenagers, adults, lose their lives. Yet they rarely get a proper funeral. It is so common to see people dying that it's no more a shock to them. And can you believe that it is really happening in this world that we live in? It is really happening in Afghanistan.

So here in this entry i want to share with you my feelings on these facts of life.

--The Children--
It breaks my heart to see children there literally fighting for food.
There is a scene showing the volunteers giving out bread for the children. They will pick up tiny pieces of bread that have fallen onto the dirty ground and eat every single crumb that they get..thats how hungry they are (thing is, its said that that scene was not in the script). Its really so devastating to see children barely 7 having to go through life like that..no. its really heartbreaking to see anyone having to go through that!

Many children there are orphans. Their parents were most probably killed during the frequent bombings and attacks.
What does this mean?
It means that these young and innocent children have to go on living without their parents. They have to fend for themselves, no matter how young they are. If they don't know how to find food, probably they won't have many chances of living.
I can't imagine how any child can survive in a world such as that..i really cannot..

The children will take any risks..will do anything and everything they can just so they can find money or food. One scene shows the volunteers trying their best to make some children stop finding metal pieces in an area filled with landmines. The children there take such risks because they have no other choice. It was a way to get money(when they sell the pieces). When the volunteers turned their backs, without any warning, one of the landmines exploded. Lives lost. Still, it was not unusual.

Did you know that most of the children there do not know how to read and write? They don't understand some simple words. -Not surprising right?
Well, here's the shocking part. Most of them know what a bomb is, what kind of weapons are being used upon them! This is how the children are. They live in such an environment that they are learning things that we don't expect a child to know. I mean, even people like us don't know..and we are like what? 17.. Its really really sad...

The children live each day not knowing what is going to happen to them later after prayers or what they will eat for their meals. They don't know whether they will see the next sunrise.

I want to help those children.
I want to see them live a normal life.
I want to see them dream.

"One is not born into the world to do everything but to do something."
--Henry David Thoreau

comeback!

2006-06-29T21:37:00.000+08:00

well..i think i'm going to blog again..

why?
-cuz i'm in the mood...

hahaha

=)

value of time

2006-06-04T23:11:00.000+08:00

From an email i received...

To realize
The value of a sister
Ask someone
Who doesn't have one.

To realize
The value of ten years:
Ask a newly
Divorced couple.

To realize
The value of four years:
Ask a graduate.

To realize
The value of one year:
Ask a student who
Has failed a final exam.

To realize
The value of nine months:
Ask a mother who gave birth to a still born.

To realize
The value of one month:
Ask a mother
who has given birth to
A premature baby.

To realize
The value of one week:
Ask an editor of a weekly newspaper.

To realize
The value of one hour:
Ask the lovers who are waiting to Meet.

To realize
The value of one minute:
Ask a person
Who has missed the train, bus or plane.

To realize
The value of one-second:
Ask a person
Who has survived an accident...

To realize
The value of one millisecond:
Ask the person who has won a silver medal in the Olympics

Time waits for no one.

Treasure every moment you have.
You will treasure it even more when
you can share it with someone special.

To realize the value of a friend:
Lose one.

happy..yet not..

2006-06-01T16:13:00.000+08:00

Actually today morning i'm supposed to go to the library with shameera and suhaimi. We planned to study but in the end yesterday, shameera told us she has project work this morning so she most probably wont be coming. Then i thought it would be weird so i decided not to go too. Suhaimi obviously was like "no must go..". He prefers to go all alone rather than not to go at all lah! I told him to change the time, instead of 10 change it to later. BUT NO! he was like so stubborn lah...inflexible also..(even though he denied it LOL :p) he refused to change the time. He tried to find other people to go to the library with him but unfortunately he couldnt find anyone.

Thus..just now he studied all alone at the library lah...ish ish ish...

I decided not to go since I had to meet up with wenkai and sandhya to buy something at heeren... okae the thing was, when we asked wenkai yesterday, wenkai said it was at heeren, then, when we were there just now he tried to fool us by saying that he wasnt sure! lol thankfully we didnt believe him ah!! wenkai..wenkai... hahahha
we went up to the right level and we were like standing at a spot..sandhya and i obviously didnt know where the shop was so we were standing there looking around..and that meannn wenkai said something like, "eh where is the shop ah?" then we were like looking around ah...then he said eh maybe its behind us!

MY GOD....

So mean right?? he purposely lah...oh god...we felt so dumb la..for some reasons i seem to fall for his silly tricks often...sighh..the other day was the pointing thing...today this...hahahahahaa but i admit it was hilarious...

anyway after we bought the thing we were looking for, i was like asing them whether they wanted to walk around or go home..and we just entered a few shops and then we left cuz sandhya didnt like window shopping..i mean if it was wenkai i understand but sandhya?? hahahahahaaa funny...but okla so we left...oh god..so funny...we went all the way to somerset to get one thing and then we left......lol!

What a hilarious day!

well at least i feel good.. =D

these passing moments

2006-05-31T22:15:00.000+08:00

Today...

A loooog day...
Shocking thing that happened today was that there was a GP paper 2 test!! We were not aware about it ah!
And my god!! It was damn hard la!!!!
Not going to score...sigghhhhhhh...

Arrghh I'm so not having a good day today...

When my friends and I were waiting for the bus to go home, I found out that Shameera might not be able to make it for the study group thingy...Then had to think of a solution...

don't feel like describing what happened at the bus stop..
anyway it wasnt so bad ah..

<>
the worst thing was just now in the bus there was this stOOOpid moth! it was like so awful.....when we were standing at the errmz standing area in the bus, it was behind me...then when we got a seat at the front, the stoooopid moth decided to fly there too! bloody *toot*

arrgghhh! you know how much i hate hate hate hate hate hate insects!

after the moth incident in the mrt last year, i dont dare take the risk of being near any insects like that..so i decided to stand...

ok heres the thing..ivan was telling us ah that when we stare at the moth, it will fly towards us. and guess what!! suhaimi decided to 'test the theory'!! iiihhhh so errgh...

moths are really disgusting i tell u!!

when i reach home, got to relax awhile then sandhya called to settle somethings..i cant reveal it now..just in case..well tell ya'll l8r..

i guess thats all for now...i actually have no idea why i'm updating my blog suddenly..i guess i'm feeling feelings that i can't keep inside anymore...hmmm...

A NEW BEGINNING

2006-05-29T22:18:00.000+08:00

After so long...i have decided to update my blog..

Why? ... i dunno... mabbe im finding a way to let out certain feelings..

Anyway...UPDATES UPDATES!!

Currently I'm in NYJC! I am enjoying myself in school..except for lessons! (;P) hahaha the ppl are so nice ah! I tink im going to miss school during the holidays...
oh god..am i crazy or what...

gone

2005-11-30T20:36:00.000+08:00

.........by 2moro 2 of my bestfrens wld hav gone overseas..*sob*sob*

so sad............ no mood to blog arh..be back later....

Graduation Nite!!

2005-11-27T16:51:00.000+08:00

Graduation nite photos have been uploaded!! Go see!!
CLICK HERE!

Farewell was great! Before going for the dinner, I promised myself not to give in to tears at the end but it did not take a lot to break that promise. As we all expected, they played "graduation" @ the end..tears threatened to flow then but i managed to stop it..i mean why shld i cry when i can always call my frens anytime? so anyway, at the end of farewell, our class took a last class photo. At that point of time, it just made me fully realise that that would be the last and final time we would be taking a class photo. Its like the journey has really finally truely ended. That is the end. It was after the photo taking, when I hugged Michelle, then I felt the sorrow. Michelle is one of the greatest, most caring and giving person I have ever known. She is someone you will like immediately. I am going to miss being where I was.

It just seemed like such a short time ago when I first entered into 3e3. It sort of marked the start of our journey in preparing for O'levels. In the course of learning, we went through a lot as a class. Even though some of the memories are better forgotten, there were times when we did have a lot of fun. After going through so much in such a short time, our path in secondary school has finally reached the end. Now, we have to choose a different path and move on. Again we have to adapt to the new pathway as it also brings a different surrounding and environment along.

As for my journey with my bestfriends, it has not ended. Hopes are that it will continue on and on. Even though it is hard to deny the fact that we most likely would not be all in the same school again, we would meet up as often as possible. I hope...

For now, I am going to end this entry and pray that moving on would not be hard. If it does happen to be hard, I know I can count on those few people around me to help me through it. :)

Farewell coming

2005-11-24T11:53:00.000+08:00

Well...its tomorrow..FAREWELL..

Farewell. Sec 4 farewell. I've been looking forward to it but now that it is finally here its so difficult to imagine that we have all gone through so much! Unbelievable right..time really flies..one moment i am sitting in the exam hall waiting for the papers to be collected and the next moment it is over! JUST LIKE THAT!

I dont know what is going to happen tomorrow..i just know that it has to be meaningful..afterall it is the last time we are all goin to be together as TKGians..even thou they might say "once a tkgian, always a tkgian"..still it wld never be the same..right? oh well..

After farewell..that is the time i will feel so lonely..*sob*sob*..aneesa's goin to India...yijin's going to indon..*sob*sob* w/o them it wont be the same.....booohooohooooo....pls may the time pass swiftly..may i find things to occupy my time..

>>flowers wither and die..ppl wither and suffer..<<

new chapter

2005-11-22T21:57:00.000+08:00

Well i changed my blog template..kinda got sick of it..PLUS i wanted to hav a head start in this new chapter in my life with someting new..lol

If you can remember, in the last layout i mentioned de fact that i wanted this chapter in my life to end..and end quick so that i can move on..well it finally is goin to end..finally right..BUT here's the thing.....

I sort of dont want it to end so fast now. If possible i want time to move real slow so that i can collect as much memories as i possibly can. Sec 4 is like the best year of all! And i am very aware that when it is over, it will never come back again..all i can do is to look back and smile and go, "i cant believe we did that" or "that was the best!"..

Even now i already begin to feel tremors of the next chapter..it is like an earthquake..waiting to happen..and no one can stop it..i am in the epicentre..

and after an earthquake, the place is never the same again..

You see, i have trouble thinking of moving on. I keep thinking..when we are all in different schools will we really meet up like we planned? or will we lose contact? that is what happened in pri 6..when we went on our separate paths, we got busy and suddenly we hardly even talked..is that going to happen again this time? will history repeat itself?

losing my bestfriends is something i cant even start to imagine! they have been really supportive of me..believin in me..pushing me on..tolerating all my crap and lameness..ppl, i know that i might have been a little too crazy at times but know that i love u guys and will always remember the times we spent together!

***special thanks to***

(¯'v'¯) Aneesa (¯'v'¯)
(¯'v'¯) Renuka (¯'v'¯)
(¯'v'¯) Yijin (¯'v'¯)
(¯'v'¯) Nasreen(¯'v'¯)
(¯'v'¯) Farah (¯'v'¯)

---> For always being there for me when i need you guys

when it is over...

2005-11-22T21:50:00.000+08:00

Well Olevel is officially over!

but somehow i still hav trouble flushing it out of my system..its like i still get guilt attacks while watching tv or reading or doing nothing..my brain will go, "hey! why arent u studying? no time u noe!!"

anyway it has been 4eva since i last blogged..lol oh well time sure does fly by real fast..:p

look @ my next post

finallyyy

2005-09-23T22:12:00.000+08:00

HeYo!!! I am BACK!!!

PRELIMS ARE OVA!! finally...lol

today we watched a movie!!! THE RED SHOES it was so gorrrryyyyy...scary too..but neesa n renuka dont seem to think so...i cant say abt yijin bcuz she was busy hiding behind her bag!! lol :p so cute you know...there i was watching the movie and renuka couldnt seem to keep quiet..sure comment every little thing..then she got busy trying to tell yijin to quit hiding...lol it was so funny...

but one thing pissed me off...the stooopid guy behind me could not seem to sit properly or something...my seat kept on vibrating...WHY>>bcuz he kicked it...dang him............

yah today was fun!!!

now i am staying away from school books for a week...(maybe less haiz)... =) so happy that prelims are finally over...

update

2005-08-08T20:11:00.000+08:00

so many days passed and so many things happened...all in 2 weeks or so...

at this moment i am really pissed off...or maybe just really sad...can't decide...

one after another horrible thing just had to happen to me...especially with my exams so near.......sometimes i just wish i can throw it all out and live like nothing else matters...just staying alive...

but no it will never happen...reality is a difficult place to live in...

of course i can end it but that is the cowards way out...and i am not one...

of that i'm sure

so in the end reality is something i must face...no matter how hard or how rough it is...

no matter if i am all alone

no matter if it seems like it will never end...

no matter anything...

no matter...

~sOme pEopLe WaNt tO livE iN tHe ReaL wOrlD yEt WheN thEy faCe reaLitY thEy loOk foR paRadiSe~

9 more days!!!

2005-07-22T18:27:00.000+08:00

9 MORE DAYS!! JUST 9 MORE!!!

Im turning 16 in 9 days!!! lolz...

yeah niwaez.......today was okay arh...nothing interesting happened today...oh well...

After Chemistry practical today, i was trying to show yi jin that i can be a lady..i can be demure..but she laughed at me...sheesh...all the way up i was trying to be that demure lady (that i am ahh... ;p) but she was like going "eww...eeww..."

man..i m a lady u noe...when we reached our classroom, i asked abby whether she thinks that i am a lady and she said "yeah.."

see!! i am...lolz..

okay...who m i kidding? i am a girl who can be a lady when i FEEL like it...otherwise i m a girl..a teen...

our principal n teachers have always been telling us to sit properly and all...but who listens? lol...i admit ah..just because we are in a girls' school, we take advantage...we sit anyway we like...lolz...i think that if i am a guest and i see the way we are sitting i will be like, "oh my..these girls!"

thats precisely why i am not a guest..i m a TKGian..lolz..

did that make sense? well..im just blabbering stuff...can't help myself..lolz...

oh well...just one more thing, we DO sit properly outside school...most of the time...we DO... ;)

~not all things are as they seem~

stresseddddd

2005-07-20T18:29:00.000+08:00

oh man...oh man...

all my hopes are gone...all gone...

i had hoped for better results for my block CA...i wanted to brush up...but my results went down...what m i to do........

all my results are either borderline pass or fail by a few marks...all!! Xcept for geog elective...believe it or not..i scored for geog...normally i would not do well but now i did it...i should be happy but i'm not...

i mean, what's the point of being happy for one subject when all the other subjects are terribly done!!!

i am going to focus already...no more playing around...no more wasting time...no more!!!

i am going to pull up my socks!!!

just now when i received my amaths paper, ms yeo was talking to me...she said a lot of things which makes a lot of sense...whatever she said was just so true!!! i thought about it on my way home...and i have decided to listen to her..AND MY MOM...

my mom has been trying to make me realise it for as long as i cld remember...so now i am going to be more serious...i m going to work really hard...

no more free fridays and no more fun saturdays!!

everyday is important now...only 5 more weeks left to PRELIMs..

15 WEEKS TO OLEVELS!!!

~i promise mama!~i promise~

bio boring no more??? --i tink its just for today

2005-07-13T16:26:00.000+08:00

I think I'm going to fall sick...

Oh man...feel like falling down on my bed and sleep...but NO i can't because I have to study in a few minutes. I'm so tired. I got flu and headache...

...man...

why now? i am having my PRELIM english ORAL next week wednesday!!! I don't want to do badly for it!!! I don't want to screw it up...

Anyway, today was alright. I actually paid attention during BIOLOGY today!! kekeke
when i said paid attention means that i PAID ATTENTION.. :)

I reached home early today. Like around 2.30pm i was home..feels good to be home early. But something just had to happen before i reach home!!
Remember the monster moth?? I saw the same looking moth AGAIN!!! this time under my block!!! what is happening?????? i feel scared.....

Okay i think i should go now..feel so damn tired..

-can i let it all go and just give up?-

normal..

2005-07-11T19:45:00.000+08:00

heyz...
today everything went on just fine. just boring during lessons. i was so bored during biology. wanted to fall asleep but i told myself NO and NO! so instead of dozing off, i spent my time trying to make myself pay attention to the lesson...it did work...for awhile..kekeke...oh well, i got to improve on that...

the most unbelievable thing happened after school though..i still can't blieve it happened but it did...

What happened was, yi jin and i went down from the top deck of de 197 bus cuz our stop was next...but somehow we were sooooo blurr!!! the bus passed the bus stop BUT didnt stop!!! cuz no one pressed the button!!! so we had to go down at the next stop...we felt like a fool cuz our shocked expression was kind of very obvious and embarrasing...

then when we were walking back towards the mrt station (we were laffing and talking animatedly) someone tapped my shoulder and said "hi"!! I was sooo shocked...i looked at the person and could not, for a few seconds, recognise the person...

then it all came back into my BLURR n crazy brain that the person was my COUSIN!!! I was soooo shocked!!! i could not believe i didnt recognise her at the beginning!!!! yi jin n kak bear was laffing at me..i was obviously red-cheeked...after that we said our HIs and talk a bit...then we said bye...lol...

a few seconds after that, yi jin's shoelaces came off...KEKEKE...we had to stop and stand in the middle of the path till yi jin tied her shoelace back...we could not stop laffing after that...cuz nothing was working out that afternoon...it was really something we could not believe happened and we are trying to deny the fact that it DID happen...we still are...

anyway, okae, lets see...i did what aneesa advised me to do...and i'd say it went on well...cuz im feeling a little better about this...kekeke thats about it...no more updates at this moment...trying to decide...still...

okae..hmmz...
OH YAH...
i feel that we(renu, neesa n farah) have not been spending a lot of time together these days..probably cuz we are all busy with our things..b4 school, i see renuka n sometimes farah...most of the time during recess i go with aneesa n yi jin...after school i go home with aneesa n yi jin...its kind of separated liddat...i can't wait till the 22nd July cuz on that day we are ALL going to the NATIONAL LIBRARY together...TOGETHER!!! so i guess patience is what i must have for now...

~MISS PATIENT~

saw IT again!!!

2005-07-08T17:34:00.000+08:00

*yawnz* today is a tiring day...don't know why..it didn't even feel like a friday..it was onli during the last period that i realised it was friday! stress? i guess so...i got my HML marks back...it was soooooooooo pathetic!

i can't believe i got such marks! man...this term i m so going to get HORRIBLE marks!!! my report will be like shit...won't even enter a JC with the L1R5 i m going to get...OH WELL....

o! and guess what!! this morning when walking towards the com lab for AMaths, yi jin was talking to me...and i saw the MONSTER ting again!!!

of course i don't know if it is the Xact same moth or not...but it was HUGE and BLACK with the same pattern!!! UNBELIEVABLE!!! this is the first time i saw a huge one 3 times in less than a few weeks!!! most probz its the same one!!

first time: carpark (home area)
2nd time: MRT
3rd: school
meaning, from admiralty to TKGS!!!

what is happening!!!! man....

FREAKY!!!

update again

2005-07-06T16:05:00.000+08:00

Heyzz...

o..today...hmmz..today is quite a relaxing day...i was not sleepy during lessons ;)

after school i collected my Olevel cert for my ML result..it looks so ermz sophisticated...lol

anyway, after that yi jin went to find mrs chia in the hall and I followed behind kekeke she wanted to tell mrs chia that she could not stay back for the quiz thing..but in the end she had to do it anyway...so yah... :p

when she finally came out of the hall, we hurriedly walked to the bus stop...took 31 and was on our way to toa payoh..she had to go 4 tuition and i had to go home. :)

we ate at BK before taking the train..@ BK, the person at the counter was b-l-u-r-r-r-r...we had to repeat our order and he was sort of cartoonish..kekkee (o..err..no offence ah..)

yi jin asked me one question at BK and i..began thinking again...well, i now noe that im not the only one in the world going through this stupid ride...im really tired of this thing...

i want to be completely free of this but i seem incapable to do so!! its really frustrating thinking of the thing...its like, i want to stop...i made an effort to stop but when it finally seems like the end, somehow a part of me misses it..somehow i don't wish for it to end...i really miss it...

everytime i start thinking of this, i would try and distract myself...it worked last time BUT somehow it is not working NOW! ARRRHH!!!!

WHY?????!!! why is it now i want to turn back time?? im regretting what i did....

how can something so right in the past seem so wrong in the present?? its not right!

Now, i just want to either be free of this or do something to make it right...and..even though many have told me its wrong, i just feel that it is not so wrong afterall....

man...im in a really confused state right now...dont know what is right or wrong in this matter anymore!!! i dont noe...just simply dont noe.........

****all smiles on my face but tears of sorrow fills my heart****

monster ting...

2005-07-03T12:30:00.000+08:00

hehe back again..forgot to say something....

On Friday, when i was going to school in de morning, i went to stand at de normal place i usually stand while waiting for de train..i was trying to recall de malay peribahasa (it is HML CA im taking first in de morn)...n so i was not really paying attention to my surroundings...now, i realised i should have paid more attention!!

there was this huge, black, monstrous moth on de floor in front of me...if u noe me well enuff, u wld noe dat i HATE REALLY HATE insects and all those tingys..im scared of them too...no actually terrified describes it better...so this moth was so disgusting! i started walking backwards so that im far away from it..

luckily for me, de entire time i was waiting for de train, i was safe..i tot dat it was de end of it..i tot dat i was going to board the train and forget all abt de THING..but apparently that was not what was fated to happen..

i was sitting down on the mrt seat, minding my own business..memorising my peribahasa..THEN de THING started fLuttERING ard in the train..almost everyone was looking at it. I mean, how could one not notice such a huge moth. I guess it flew into the train just now. (stoopid moth!)

Obviously I was worried it might decide to say hello to me. (stoopid moth!) I was praying so hard that it would not come close to me. Apparently I think I did not pray hard enough cuz it flew right in front of me and landed on my fingers!!! (stoopid moth!)

My reaction if you don't already know, was, "AAAARGGGHHHH!"

And the thing is, in the morning, the train is normally quite peaceful. So, my scream sounded Xtra loud. (stoopid moth!) Anyway, other than scream, my hand did something (im not Xactly sure what cuz it happened in a split second). The THING fell onto the seat beside me..i dont feel like explaining how come it could land on the seat when there was a man sitting there. yeah...anyway it did not stay there. It flew away but still in the train. SIGH (stoopid moth!)

I was so embarrassed! Everyone was looking at me...... The THING was heavy and it landed with a plop sound..it was soooo DISGUSTING!!! Never will I forget this! Never!!!

This makes me hate all those things more!!! HATE THEM!!! AND I WILL FOREVER HATE THEM!!!! (stoopid moth!)

can get used to this

2005-07-03T12:10:00.000+08:00

heyhey!

i can soooooo get used to this feeling!! LOL this i'm-free feeling. its so fun...i can read, read, read, play com, play com, read, read, read n watch tv!!! hahhahaaaaaaaa!!!

well...i noe that i only have this weekend but so what!! hahahahaaaaaaaa

im tinking of buying a book but i cant dcide which one to buy...im not goin to buy both...even if de temptation is there..

hehe...lets see...what else is there to sae...

ohh...yea..how cld i 4get...lydia..dia...so as i was saying, :) i tink i mite b getting over the "wanting to do something im not supposed to do" ting... lol...yah...soon lydia soon...real soon...

:) :) :) :) :)

ITS DONE!!!!!

2005-07-01T17:41:00.000+08:00

YESS!!! I took my last CA paper today!!
Good news: It's OVER
BAD News: PHYSICS was sooooooooooo difficult!!!! man..

ANywAy...its over...at last. I can actually take a break! However, I know that it is not a long break i'm going to have. After the youth day holiday, its BACK to work time...STUDY study STUDY study...until after Os..CANT wait till then...

Oh well..................

I'm so tired. -have been sleeping late these past few weeks- Why? Because of the CAs..sighs... :(
Now, its over so sleep HERE I COME!!! lol..

Been wondering...what if I'm not supposed to do something but I want to do that something even when I know that the something is not good for me?? What should I do?

Its not as if the something is something really wrong or anything...Just that its not good for me...

I have been wondering about it since I went holiday. And the thought stuck in my head till now. --just that during the busy period I thought less of it--but doesn't mean I didn't think about it a little..just a tinney winney bit...

oh well, hope something or someone or some-wadeva will come and show me a sign...

-I'll be waiting-

Screwed up

2005-06-28T16:26:00.000+08:00

AAAAAARHH!!! Im so dead!!! Today's CA papers were difficult!!! Yesterday we had SS and Geog Elect..it was..ermz...wen i get back my results den i sae... TODAE was soooo bad!!! the papers were difficult!!! im so dead!!! no hope to actually get gd grades for all my subjects this term...haizzz.....i really hope that the other papers are manageable... really really hope it is... haiz...
lets see, im working hard for what? for Os and prelims...that im not going to screw up..i hope! kk gtg study AGAIN...what a life!!! but "SACRIFICE NOW, ENJOY LATER...ENJOY NOW, SACRIFICE YOUR FUTURE" so yah...cyaz

SVC Launch

2005-06-25T22:45:00.000+08:00

Heya!

Today I went for the SVC Launch. I kept on telling myself (and my bestfriends) that "this better be worth it". That was the line I kept on repeating until I, myself, got irritated. And...guess what?

It was not too bad but I would not really say I enjoyed it overly much. Renuka and I were kind of free most of the time. We felt guilty but there was nothing much for us to do I guess. So, that was why we kept on walking around trying to find something to do. It worked for awhile. We helped the other team with their jobs. However, after that we got bored again! It went on in that pattern for the whole morning.

I asked Aneesa to call my hp. She did after a few msgs. LOL not that I'm surprised or anything. =p anyway, we talked on the phone for quite sometime. That helped with the boredom. kekeke

Oh yeah! In the morning, it was so hot and there was no wind. We were all hoping that it might be a little cooler later. AND yeah it did get cooler! God even decided to make the weather very cool. It started RAINING. Jason was telling us to pray that it would not rain. That obviously did not work cuz it rained anyway. However, thankfully after awhile, it stopped. It became warm again. This time everyone was happy with it. [i think... ;)]

Anyway, lots of funny things happened. Most of the time I think it was because of Jeffrey. I think...Renuka felt like knocking his head (jokingly of course but the temptation was there). You know why? Because we asked him to help us move the panel...It was heavy and we tried but it was difficult. So we thought that since he was free, might as well help us. So...we approached him and asked him nicely. He was like "oh". Then he began walking towards the tent (LIKE A BOSS!!! very in control! very sure of himself). We were gigglin a little looking at him. So as i was saying, he walked there and when he was there, he touched the panel. Walked to the back of the panel and touched the panel again. And he said, "yeah ok".

LOL!!! we asked him to help and he said yeah ok..We didnt want his comment!! LOL We started laughing!!! He touched the panel again and said that it was okae...Oh and the way he touched the panel...oh man! Renuka commented to him abt it!!! he was like touching a girl!!! =p Errgh...LOL

yeah that was one of the few silly things that he did...but its okae it made us laugh!! :)

overall i think that the day was not too bad...but not too good either...-no offence-

okae...gtg now...11.08 redi... got to read social studies and geog elective!!! ARRRGH!!! sick of studying!!! oh well....like i said i wish that it will end soon...i guess every single day that passes means that we are one day closer to the end...yeah :( nite!

Just a little something...

2005-06-25T22:24:00.000+08:00

Life's Journey

-Pot Of Gold-

Young girl-YG

Old lady-OL

OL: When we were born, we had an empty book. It was a book waiting to be written. As we go through life’s journey, our story gets written. Only thing is, not many people realised it. They tend to think that “Oh, I am living for nothing. I am a nobody. My life is worthless.” That is not true. You see YG, everyone has a destiny, whether you choose to believe it or not. Nobody lives for nothing. You just have to find it. Find your Destiny. First step is doing what you love, what you have passion for. Then with hope, you will find your destiny at the end of the journey. The next steps will fall in front of you. Take up the journey. Get your book written. Life is not without its obstacles. Take it as if your pen ran out of ink while writing your book. All obstacles make you stronger.Like the pen, when you have written a lot, the ink begins to fade but you get a new pen and the ink is as strong as ever. Take the obstacles as a challenge.Believe me YG, after you go thru’ all life’s obstacles and pain, you will become stronger. At the end of every rainbow, there is a pot of gold. Take the end of your journey as the pot of gold. You will taste life’s pleasures after the obstacles. It’s life’s promise to everyone-all who dares to take up the challenge and not give up halfway. And when you grow old and wrinkled, you will get to read your life book. It will come in the form of memories. That is what you will have that will keep you going after the end of your journey. Memories, be it good or bad, they are yours and yours alone. There, that is your Pot Of Gold.

BACK!!!

2005-06-24T00:01:00.000+08:00

Its been forever since i last updated this blog rite..lol reason was i was so bz...no time to actually write down my tots...oh well...now im taking a break from my books for awhile...so u see, i actually even changed my template..i got bored looking at de same ting over and over again...ANYWAE... :) a lot of things have happened in de last few mths... lets see, if i actually pen down everyting dat happened, it will take forever...lol...
so i tink i prefer to tell u abt my holidae..kekeke i noe u muz b tinking...so bz yet i still hav time to go 4 a holidae... well, take it as de last fun time i m going to hav till after de Os..i shall upload de fotos asap...dont noe wen thou...i promised a few ppl dat i was goin to show dem de foto asap since i got back but its been more den a wk redi...sori ppl... :( i seriously hav been studying 4 de block CAs...scary...just thinking of de CAs make me wanna...oh nvm..i promised my mom i m not goin to sae such tings again... CCCCCC i m keeping my promise :p anyway gtg now its already 12.10am!!! gota go slp so 2moro can wake up early and STUDY again...sshhheeeshhh...kk nitezzz :)

update

2005-03-18T08:31:00.000+08:00

lalala....im in school...waiting for my sis to send me the social studies file...online dat is..hehe niwae, kellyn cldnt make it last minute so we hav to make do without her...updating dis sad blog of mine...havent uploaded for the longest of time...mainly my reason is i m sooooooo super busy!!!
our one week holidae is not exactly a holidae...i m already quite lucky cuz i was free on mondae...but i still feel that this holiday is the busiest one i hav eva had...almost everydae i will hav someting on...lets see...
mondae: FREE!!!
tuesdae: LEGACY project
wednesdae: chemistry course in spore poly
thursdae: went to collect de paperweight in de morning
fridae: social studies (morning) chemistry lesson (late morning) library (afternoon)
SEEEEEEE!!!! so busy!!!!

depressed

2005-02-25T20:56:00.000+08:00

2dae is juz so slow...im like so tired...have not been sleeping well...i have a feeling its bcuz i m stressed...scared cuz i m getting my MT 'o' level result...how m i going to score? what if its a B? or worse C? D? haiz....stressssssed....
den to add to de stress, problems...what a life.... anywaez...
i was thinking...whether or not they care...relie truly care...i mean i m sori to think dis wae but it doesnt feel good inside to hav these doubts...i know that i m loyal to those hu i care abt...but i duno if they are loyal to me...i cant elaborate here...so yah...haiz...

green day-boulevard of broken dreams

2005-02-20T00:14:00.000+08:00

GREEN DAY-Boulevard of Broken Dreams

I walk a lonely road

The only one that I have ever known

Don't know where it goes

But it's home to me and I walk alone

I walk this empty street

On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams

Where the city sleeps

and I'm the only one and I walk alone

I walk alone

I walk a...

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me

My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating

Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me

'Til then I walk alone

Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Aaah-ah,

Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Ah-ah

I'm walking down the line

That divides me somewhere in my mind

On the border line

Of the edge and where I walk alone

Read between the lines

What's fucked up and everything's alright

Check my vital signs

To know I'm still alive and I walk alone

I walk alone

I walk a...

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me

My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating

Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me

'Til then I walk alone

Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Aaah-ah

Ah-ah, Ah-ah

I walk alone

I walk a...

I walk this empty street

On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams

Where the city sleeps

And I'm the only one and I walk a...

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me

My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating

Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me

'Til then I walk alone...

satisfaction

2005-02-20T00:06:00.000+08:00

ahh...man! i feel so satisfied...kekeke 1stly, i managed to finish renuka's blog template..wif de chatterbox and all...oh yeah...den she liked it!!! yeah!!! all my hard work is appreciated!!! kekeke den 2ndly, i managed to find time to upload a song into my blog!!! after so long...i always wanted to but couldnt find de time to do it... kekeke aniwaez, de song is by green day, boulevard of broken dreams...oh i love dat song...so nice...my sis oso love the song...hehee...de feeling of pure satisfaction in me is so great!!!

a reminder...

2005-02-08T18:19:00.000+08:00

Nice quotes i found online...
"All that we send into the lives of others comes back into our own."--Anonymous
"A candle loses nothing of its light when lighting another."--Kahlil Gibran
"Volunteers don't necessarily have the time, but they have the heart."--Anonymous
"One is not born into the world to do everything but to do something."--Henry David Thoreau
"We make a living by what we get, we make a life by what we give."--Winston Churchill
"Nothing is worth regreting. You just have to look back and learn from it. Only when you dismiss a mistake you've done or you think too much about the bad past, will you suffer. By then, you would have missed a lot in life."

haha!! SHE'S A LOSER

2005-02-08T17:38:00.000+08:00

Hahahaha!!! juz now when i was doing my english project with woan ni in front of de red cross room...of all places but oh well...anyway, when i was sitting there, stoopid woman (u shld noe hu or else nvm..) came to me to ask me if i can go for flag day (even thou i love doing volunteer work, i will try and avoid doing it if it is wif rc)..
den i was like, "wad? when?"...
she told me dat it was on sum saturday in april...
i was obviously not interested from de beginning...so i said no i cant...
den she was like, "why?"...
since she asked, i told her that it was on a Saturdae so my mom wont allow...
and she was so damn rude when she answered me...
EVEN woan ni was telling me and renuka dat i she was so rude..
HAHAHA!!!
she was like, "parents dont allow is not a reason"...
i raised my eyebrow and said to her angrily, "u go call my mom ah!"
hahaha den she kept quiet and walked away (mabbe she did show a stupid face but i dun relie care cuz i got de last laugh!)...
hahahhaa!!!!!! oh man dat felt so good!!! sooo good!!! stoopid girl! try and piss me off again lah...
make me mad once, i mite forgive u...make me mad again and again (like wad de stoopid bi**h did!) you will so get it from me one day!
2dae is de last time shes going make me mad...next time, i m so going to shout in her face!
******hate her so much******

what is love?

2005-02-07T18:04:00.000+08:00

When someone says "i love you", its said to be a confession of one's feelings for another...BUT, what IS the real meaning of LOVE?

Is it when you can't stop thinking of that special someone?

Is it when you look at that someone and your heart does funny things?

Is it when you want the best for that person even if it is not to your advantage?

Is it when you can see the good side of him as well as the bad side of him yet still have feelings for him? Care for him?

Is it when you feel a sense of security being with him?

Is it when you put all your trust in him?

Believe in him no matter what the case?

Is it whenever you want to sleep, he is the one you think about?

Dream of him?

Miss him when you don't see him?

So what is love?

I asked Renuka...she said

"Love is a feeling that comes whenever you look at that special someone and you know that you belong together. You know that you want to spend every single minute of the rest of your life with that person. Love is not selfish. Love is caring, concern and affection."

I have no idea how to conclude this...so i guess i will just end by saying dat love holds a different meaning to different people.

reflection2

2005-02-04T21:35:00.000+08:00

todae was great...i tink...interact meeting today...anyway...i just decided to reflect on what's going on in my life...lets see...
Staying back in school...hmm..
Mondays: nothing
Tuesdays: Library duty
Wednesdays: rc training
Thursdays: {even wk--physics}{odd wk--library decor}
Fridays: Interact club
so filled rite...oh well...at least i m doing things dat i enjoy EXCEPT for u noe wad on wednesdays!
other than all this...wad else m i involved in...hmmz...

currently i m proposing (wif yijin) for a home visit to a childen's home...most probably to Pertapis again..or mabbe Darul Ma'awa (or sumting like dat)
m an EB fren in sch

love

2005-02-02T18:18:00.000+08:00

hmmz...i tink i just realised someting...someting dat i was so confused about...so frustrated abt...so unsure abt...its all crystal clear to me now...but i cant rite it here in the blog...how sad...but i wont take de risk...nah nah nah...no matter how much i want to...i wont...anywayz...
i m so sick of my stoopid core cca!!! sick sick sick!!! cant stand it!!! i regret 100% for joining!!!!!!!! arrgh!!! cant wait till de ccas 4 sec 4s end...BUT BUT BUT i dont want the time to come so fast too...cuz den it means end of interact club...NOW dats sad...end of rc is ok but interact...haiz...wad a life...wad a life...wad a pathetic situation i m in...
want to end all this nonsense...want to run away and disappear...stress.........stress...........i dread wednesdays!!! i used to like wednesdays but not anymore...not anymore..........
*staring at the com screen*
i wonder...wonder if i disappear and never come back will it make a difference? i know i m not at the right state of mind now...but i relie cant help it...i m still wondering...
i know one thing!
i hate tkgrcy!!!

stress

2005-01-28T23:30:00.000+08:00

Again i have not been updating de blog...oh well...the reason is so obvious --> no time...haiz...it seems like everyday theres not enuf time..wadeva my mom said since so long ago is so true...she said, "sekarang ade time, nanti biler dah sec 4, u'll wish dat everyday has 34 hours instead of 24!" dats what mama slalu cakap... memang betol pun...
anywayz...i m so sad...........................found out i passed my social studies BUT i failed my amaths...haiz!!! pass sumting i tot i wld fail...and fail sumting i sort of prefer...cuz i tink i prefer amaths and emaths to humanities...how depressing...
therefore, i have decided to study more AND study smart (like aneesa always says)
next week is a very very very packed and stressful week...
Monday: Biology Formative Test
Tuesday: EMaths CA
Wednesday: Geography Elective Test
Thursday: ?
Friday: English Project Presentation (CA component)
**Other than all this, we are going to have an AMaths Spring Test on one of the days from wednesday onwards...AND they also mentioned that we are going to have a Social Studies CA...but i didnt hear that...ANYWAY...HAIZZZZZ**
Now the problem is i have not enuff time...tonight i m going to sleep super late! haiz...studying biology (EXCRETION) until finish...so sleepy *yawnz* 2moro whole day i m not free...helping out in the CDC thingy...left with Sunday...BUT, afternoon i have tuition and then at nite going to adek's campfire nite tingy...SO TELL ME WEH M I GOING TO FIND THE TIME I NEED??!!!
gtg now...studying time!!! oh well...

todayyy...

2005-01-20T21:20:00.000+08:00

i am going crazy!!! hahahahaa!!!!!!!!! i m obsessed with taufik! lolz! nah la...i juz like him a lot! hehehehe TAUFIK...my idol!!! how bout datt!! kekekeke...
anywaez...hmmz...now i m thinking about the advice Mr Peh gave us all during biology class...
its goes sumting like dis...
"Even though a candle cant emit a lot of light for everyone, it can still emit some light to brighten up a place a bit..."
to me, the whole thing makes a lot of sense! and it is so true...i can think of so many meanings for it and it all makes sense! and its so meaningful...
another advice he gave us was...
"What's complicated is simple and what's simple is complicated."
that to me is also very meaningful...i mean, sumting dat we find complicated or difficult can be made easy by asking, researching or learning about it...by then, the complicated thing is already simple...AND, a simple thing can be made complicated...its like when you already know your basics, you will move on to the difficult stuff...and again, when its difficult, u will make it simple...and it will go on...its a cycle...oh man it sooooo makes a lot of sense!!!

A new year

2005-01-20T21:04:00.000+08:00

ahh...ok how long has it been since i last updated this blog...hahaha a looong time ago...anywayzz...i have a perfect reason!!!
You see...when school reopened, i was very busy with the secondary one orientation stuff...everyday i stayed back together with the rest of the class ICs...whatever it is, i enjoyed myself very much!!! the class i was in charged of was sec 1e1!!! and i admit they were not xactly that enthu in the beginnning...but i dun blame them bcuz obviously they have not "warmed up" yet you see...anywae, they were broken up into groups and the group i was in charged of was soooooo nice!!! they were enthu but they also like to sabo me...haiz...everyting i asked them to do they will ask me to start or do 1st...naughty naughty...hehehehe!!! :p
the campfire was also really fun!!! it started raining not too long after they lite de campfire...so sad...BUT it din matter cuz we had a wet weather programme too!!! they had the campfire in the hall! hahaha yah i admit dat its not xactly the best place to have a campfire...but we made the best out of it... :)
dat nite also i got myself a new nickname...(i still dont noe what i did dat made them think i qualify for the nick...) as i was saying, the sec 1s, my wonderful, kind and creative juniors...started calling me sotong...and to make things "better" they were taught a "clap" earlier....it was called 'the sotong' clap...de wae to do it is....*clap*bloop bloop bloop sotong!
yah and dats what they called me....haizzz....do i relie look "sotongie"? hmmz...i dun tink so...but even when i told them i dun deserve to b called sotong, it didnt stop them from calling me that...so actuali i m kind of used to it by now... hahahaha!!!

link to yahoo photos

2004-12-30T21:32:00.000+08:00

uhh i just remembered...to c de fotos of de YV party--> click here

YVIP PARRTYY

2004-12-30T18:40:00.000+08:00

Yesterday morning at around 11.30 i went out of my house to go and meet aneesa at toa payoh..our plan was to meet at around 12 and go together to meet renuka at the mac near her place..but but but...i was a little late and i only reached toa payoh around 12.15 like dat...BUT aneesa was more den late... :p hahaha she was still at tanah merah...haiz so i went to meet renu 1st and she will meet us at the mac..we are meeting early so we can cum up wif de proposal for de fund raising!!! hehehe so yah...anywayzz...all dis not de party part...obviously...
PARTY PART!!!
Now for the party part...de party was on top of a roof of some building in chinatown at the playground..lolz...but really cool...a very nice place..we also had natural air-con de whole day..not bad! a gd change rather than de normal places we go to...yah...anywaez...de party started out a little dull...cuz there not many ppl were wif us..yet..hehehe so yah..we played a game while waiting..i forgot what the game was called...anywaez...de real fun bgan wen justin came...renuka said dat and we agreed! u wanna noe y?? bcuz we started playing really LAME games...so so so lame...we played "open close", "big fish small fish" and "polar bear" or sumting like dat larh...lolz de game we enjoyed most was the polar bear (or sumting like dat)...lolz...de game is like murderer...onli dis is a little different..wif a gamemaster and paramedics..ok so we played de game for a long time and everyone enjoyed it!

yah so basically de party is games, games and more games...lolz...we also played one more game b4 we all left the place for dinner at mac...so aneesa, renu and me onli started to go home at ard 9.30 plus plus if im not rong...or mabbe later...de rest of them went to play pool...hehehe so yah...it was relie fun!!! hahhaaha relie relie relie fun!!!
SOME MORE FOTOZ TO SEE...

regrets?

2004-12-30T18:04:00.000+08:00

Ok...i m feeling like i have so many things i want to say but i just don't know how to let it all out...i think i should start with yesterday's YVIP party...yah i should...

quotes

2004-12-28T10:15:00.000+08:00

Nice quotes i found online...

"All that we send into the lives of others comes back into our own."
--Anonymous

"A candle loses nothing of its light when lighting another."
--Kahlil Gibran

"Volunteers don't necessarily have the time, but they have the heart."
--Anonymous

"One is not born into the world to do everything but to do something."
--Henry David Thoreau

"We make a living by what we get, we make a life by what we give."
--Winston Churchill

reflectionz

2004-12-28T10:08:00.000+08:00

Recently, an earthquake and a tsunami hit asia's coastlines...i am not going to write down the details here of course...just thinking a lot about it...
Makes me think of many things...life is unpredictable...we can just pray and hope for the best...
Looking at the victims..the people suffering there...makes me again realise how lucky i am..how lucky we all are...i mean..looking at the news..people lost their homes, loved ones...the number of victims is so huge! when i watch the news at night...this heart of mine feels for them...but i know that whatever i feel looking at them, is not even half their feelings...not even half their suffering...its just so painful looking at them knowing that i m enjoying myself here and they are crying there...
We are just very lucky...so very lucky...
Last night when i was writing the draft for this entry, i was also on the phone with Renuka...she came up with an idea that i totally support! the idea is to organise a fund raising in school for the victims...we are going to come up with the proposal tomorrow! now, this is something that makes me look forward to going to school next week...i get to help them!!!!!! ---if the school allows us that is...hopefully they do!!! oh i just can't wait!!! reminds me of the fund raising my primary 6 class in WRPS orgainised for the india earthquake...and it was sooooo fun doing it last time! now, orgainising it with my best friends is going to be really fun!

next year

2004-12-27T01:15:00.000+08:00

NEXT YEAR...
next year...
next year...
next year...
i have no idea what will happen...i can only plan and try my best to reach my goals...
so far...the most important goal i have to reach is to get into a JC...and to reach that goal, i have to score in my o-levels...
and to score, i have to study real hard...concentrate on my studies...and to my mom, the only way i can do that is to lessen other things...such as volunteer work (esp mentoring and library) and slacking (shopping and basically wasting time). i agree with my mom...just that i find that it is not so easy to do that...oh well..i have to do it one way or another...
______________________________
ANYWAYZ...other then blogging tonite, i have been chatting at the same time...and thank you to someone i think i have decided...yah...i have totally decided! hahaha! no more problems! hahaha!
"lolz~" ;) thankz...

tots this past year...

2004-12-26T22:09:00.000+08:00

Looking back at what i've been through and what i've experienced this year really amazes me..its like i can't believe that i've been through all that, i've done all that..and i did not regret a thing! whatever bad and good things that has happened to me has taught me a lot..so i can't say i regretted it!

~"Nothing is worth regreting. You just have to look back and learn from it. Only when you dismiss a mistake you've done or you think too much about the bad past, will you suffer. By then, you would have missed a lot in life."~

A short summary of what i've done this year... [impt things that i can remember that is :)]

Earlier 2004...

-Started mentoring at TKPS-

-Became a committee member in TKGS Library-

*Learnt that even though i am helping pupils in TKPS, i still have time to do many other things. Also, if i can help those pupils, i should be able to help my sister more in her studies. -> have to help out more coaching my sister...

Middle 2004...

-Realised even more that i hated my cca-

-Became a Vice-chairman in TKGS Library-

-Took my MT O-Level Oral-

-NEAR THE END OF 2004, Mentoring ended... :(-

End 2004...

-Took my MT O-Level Paper-

-Took my Final Year Exams and got the results-

-Disappointed with the results-

-Did something i thought would work but didn't...i was initially very sad but i went though it easily because of my darling sister and dear best friends..i admit that it might not have been obvious that i went through this but it was because of the strong support that i had behind me..it was the believe that i had that i made the right decision (also from ppl i love and care about) -

-Joined YVIP-

-ENJOYED MYSELF VERY MUCH-

-Went through my YVIP attachment..i didn't finish it though..because i went on holiday on the first week of the attachment..i did the 2nd week of the attachment only...-

-Had lots of YVIP activities (that i ENJOYED)

All the stuff mentioned above are obviously not the only things i did this year...They are just the few i thought i wanted to mention...All these have one way or another taught me something...

Soledad~Westlife~

2004-12-26T22:08:00.000+08:00

Soledad

-Westlife-

If only you could see the tears in the world you left behind

If only you could heal my heart just one more time

Even when I close my eyes

There's an image of your face

And once again I come to realise

You're a loss I can't replace

Soledad

It's a keeping for the lonely

Since the day that you were gone

Why did you leave me

Soledad

In my heart you were the only

And your memory lives on

Why did you leave me

Soledad

Walking down the streets of Nothingville

Where our love was young and free

Can't believe just what an empty place

It has come to be

I would give my life away

If it could only be the same

Cause I can't still the voice inside of me

That is calling out your name

Soledad

It's a keeping for the lonely

Since the day that you were gone

Why did you leave me

Soledad

In my heart you were the only

And your memory lives on

Why did you leave me

Soledad

Time will never change the things you told me

After all we're meant to be love will bring us back to you and me

If only you could see

Soledad

It's a keeping for the lonely

Since the day that you were gone

Why did you leave me

Soledad

In my heart you were the only

And your memory lives on

Why did you leave me

Soledad

so sleepy

2004-12-18T22:58:00.000+08:00

todae stuck in the hall from 1pm-7.15pm...for the yvip tingy...oh man and it was so cold at the bgining...we started wif de sharing session...as in we shared our xperiences wif everyone dat lasted till ard 4.15 i tink...den got a tok...a short one dat is...abt the different comm..after dat is de fun part...game!!! hahaha i relie tot it was fun cuz we had a taste of wad de diff com ppl will do. i was in de marketing team. wad we have to do is to market svc! so fun! den later de person in charge cum find jeffrey and me to ask us if we interested in marketing...den shu lian and aneesa oso join! so fun!!! cant wait!!! ok la i noe i not elaborate but i so tired...

nitez

2004-12-17T23:40:00.000+08:00

ahh...i m actuali done choosing de template and modifying the impt tings...ahhh at last can sleep hahaha! cant wait 4 2moro's yv meeting! hahaha i juz love yv! cant help it!!! okok i better go sleep nowz

1st entry...sad dae

2004-12-17T21:12:00.000+08:00

dis is my 1st entry here...dunno lah y i started dis blog...i tink cuz i m so bored...anywae...2dae is a sad dae...Y? bcuz 2dae is de last day of the YVIP attachment...haiz.....so sad...summore thomas (our tf) not there lorh...haiz...anyhowz...de hole ting is actualy fun lah in the end...it started boring cuz nothing to do but ended fun cuz we had a barbecue...bishan home is really the best! i m going to miss all the residents...de next time i go there...its going to b different...even if i go there wif my grp its going to b different...no more disney's attachment...no more disney (the name of our grp)...*sobz*sobz*....di4n(dats it for now)...